That morning, as I sat reading my Bible in the quiet of my living room, with nothing but the sound of the heater taking the edge off of the chilly air and the kitty purring on my lap, I impatiently thought, Get to the point already!

I had things to do and clocks to hang and didn’t truly care all that much about the dimensions, construction materials, nor color schemes that I was reading about.

Where are you God in this? And where will I find those last two clocks? were closer to my thoughts that morning……

I recognized I was being stretched and could feel every percent of it.

I couldn’t imagine taking on one more thing - especially such an important thing.

But so often, we have to weigh our “yeses” and separate the good ones from the best ones.

I was asked to think about it, pray about it, sleep on it, and call back in the morning with an answer……

On my last training run - three days before the race - I woke up to my alarm and to the sound of rain. 

I got out of bed and laced up my shoes anyways. 

I ran in the steady rain and felt like I could have been on a Nike commercial. I smiled when I realized that I had trained in all of the possible elements come Race Day - heat, humidity, cool, wind, hills, and…rain. 

I came home, soaking wet, to find my husband so I could tell him I was officially trained. I was fired up and he just smiled……

In the spring of 2017, my love for running woke up from a deep sleep. With three marathons and four half marathons under my belt, I wanted to run another half — specifically Chicago’s. If I wasn’t able to fundraise in time, then I decided that my city’s half marathon in Clinton, Iowa would suffice. 

I prayed about it and didn’t feel the peace that I knew I was hoping for. I was still nursing Titus (who had had just turned one) and planned on continuing for the majority of another year…… 

It was a day of firsts. The first day of school. And the first day to have two in school at the same time.

I homeschool, which means I have the flexibility to choose our curriculum as well as our schedule. We start the day after Labor Day and all my teacher friends are jealous…… 

Yes, this birthday hit me hard. He was the one growing up and here I was the one experiencing the growing pains. Normal, yes. Easy, no. 

If I were to forget my purpose as a mother, I would have been overcome with emotion when my eight-year-old birthday boy didn’t need me at his Friend Party.

The truth is, I am not raising babies, but adults; and it's imperative to keep that within my sights as my children continue to grow and develop into independent, self-propelled individuals……

When life gets painful, when things are tough, when the load is heavy - we beg “Uncle!” and cry out for “Mercy!” We scramble to find the eject button, the exit door, or the escape hatch. We long to throw in the towel and quit.

In those moments, we have to realize that so often, it is our very pain that draws us closer to Him. And that same pain is oftentimes the very process that He uses to produce fruit in our life……